I’ve just erased
my “fake” account on a dating site. I just Couldn’t do it. Had one bloke right
away at my chat board and I simply Panicked! Even with a fake account I did!
Too much
demons from the past still blocking my way. Met my Charming ex at a dating site
and I’ve seen a lot of guys who I know who are married or are within a
relationship, on those websites! That’s seems to me a real trust issue for a lifetime
there. Why Did I do it anyway? ‘cause I wanted to fight my Demons, conquer the past and embrace the future.
I think I
have to meet a really nice guy in real life, in the flesh, so I can see and
observe who he is and what he does, how he smells, talks, sings and sounds &
feels. Take my time to get to know him. Though these days the Internet &
dating seems to be one and the same!
When I was
younger I used to go to a pub or a concert or party’s. Meeting people over there
was much easier. Now a days there is something like Tinder???? What is that?
For youngsters anyway, not for a Gal like me!
Sometimes I
feel lonely. I’m 54 and single. I look & feel much younger so that’s my
problem. Guys my age are most of the times old and bored or playing hooky. The
nice guys are married or gay. The few Single guys I meet over here, Are not my
type or don’t measure my standards. That’s got to do with the fact that I live
in a foreign Country. Different Culture although It’s also in Europe.
Of course
it also has something to do with who I am! My experience in life, my hopes,
dreams, fears & expectations. But be honest! They’ve got the same issues!
We all do! So Why should I even try? OMG I can hear you sigh over here! Don’t! I’m just
thinking out loud! That’s what you get when you’re Single for a long period of
time. You think out loud and talk to yourself or your Computer screen. Yeah! I
always have to watch out to not do that in the store or on the streets. Hahahah.
When I use to see and hear People do that, I laughed ‘cause I thought that was silly and
that they had to be sick in the mind to do such a thing. So you see, I come
from a long way of learning in life. But sometimes I catch myself doing it and
then I start laughing out loud! And think: Leck mich am Arse!
What Do I
do next? I just keep on dreaming and living my life. Maybe one day I’ll meet
somebody right with whom I feel the famous Click And he does too. Who knows I
probably know him already or he’s on his way right now! I say: Till then! Lets
meet! ;)
© Jadja
